Cop(s) and Robber(s)
by tafih.triple.threat
Summary: The notorious thief, the Blue Paladin, has been terrorizing the city of Arus by playing senseless pranks on the local Arusians and stealing priceless valuables in grandiose feats involving impeccable disguises, gymnastics, BB guns, dummies, and confetti (lots of confetti). But somehow, always, those valuables return to the police station in the hands of Inspector Keith Kogane (and


The city-state of Arus is a beautiful, remote, and bustling metropolis in the middle of the Altean Mountains, holding a population of nearly 10 million people.

One of those people is Inspector Keith Kogane, a high-ranking and fairly successful detective in the city's police force.

And, typically, the problems that the young Det. Kogane has, he notices, are with other people living in Arus.

He thinks, at times, that it's because he hails from El Paso and is not a local.

* * *

 _One such problem is that his superior never seems to stop yelling at him._

Like right now, as he attempts to slip – undetected – into the Arus Police Department building and instantly, Commissioner Allura barks at him.

"Kogane!"

The detective jolts and groans inwardly as he turns to face and salute her.

"Where the _hell_ have you been?" she shouts while stalking up to him. "Blue already came and went with the Tear of Balmera and you are nowhere to be found."

"That's because…" Kogane digs his hand into his chest pocket and pulls out a priceless necklace stringing a large electric blue teardrop crystal. "I _have_ the Tear of Balmera."

Kogane putting the previously stolen necklace in her hand does not sate Allura's temper. But rather, she cannot help but interrogate, "How is it that you always bring back the item but never the thief?"

"He always uses silly and complicated tricks to evade capture but I can detain him enough to grab whatever he seems to have stolen," Kogane responds monotonously and tries to inch away to his cubicle but she stops him by grabbing him by the crook of his elbow.

Her eyes narrow, and her gaze burrows into his. She says, "I want Blue in Prorok Correctional by the end of this month. Is that understood, detective?"

"Yes'm," Keith mutters flatly, which betrays the inner terror and slight solicitude he holds for his superior. She releases him and turns to hand over the evidence to another officer to check.

And Keith runs away to his desk.

A few minutes later, Detective Kogane huffs as he shovels his forehead into the wood of his desk. Then a steaming foam cup of ramen with a set of disposable chopsticks appears next to his elbow.

He looks up to see his captain, Takashi Shirogane, smiling down at him.

"Black Shin Ramen's your favorite, right?"

Keith rises from the physical manifestation of his groaning and sits up in his worn-out swivel chair. "Yeah…you didn't have to get me anything."

"Come on," Shiro quips good-naturedly, "The least I can do is get my best detective a cup of ramen."

"If I were the best, the Blue Paladin would be behind bars right now," Keith simmers as he slides the cup towards him and splits the chopsticks.

"You've brought back every single thing he stole. Don't let what the Commish' says get to you," Shiro says in his typical reassuring voice. "Allura means well. She's just …frustrated, you know?"

Keith smiles awkwardly back. "Yeah, thanks, Shiro."

 _And another problem appears._

In the depth of his heart, Keith notices a flaring of the remnants of his old and secret infatuation with the older man. But it is all expertly veiled by his consistently stoic expressions.

He quickly forces himself to remember the night he caught the captain and the commissioner sharing a kiss outside Shiro's apartment a few months ago. He has also heard rumors that the two are secretly engaged.

The best way to move on is to move on, he tells himself.

"So how did you get the Tear of Balmera back?" Shiro asks, leaning against the detective's desk.

Keith deadpans – his eyes seem to go white as his mind travels to the memories (and the events of the foreseeable future) that represent the biggest problem he has in his life, currently.

* * *

 _And the biggest, most burdensome, most taxing, most bothersome, most complicated, and most surreptitious problem that Detective Keith Kogane has is the fact that he is fucking **The Blue Paladin.**_

"Not out of my volition," Keith growls at the man who straddles him suggestively (and who also handcuffed both his wrists to a pipe).

"Oh, _please_ , detective," the notorious thief chuckles as he unbuckles the policeman's belt. "You love this. Why else would you make it _so_ easy to capture you?"

Kogane scoffs, appalled and with hurt pride, "I don't – you just use-,"

" _Silly and complicated tricks_?" Blue completes while slipping the leather belt from out of the belt loops of Kogane's pants with a clean, tantalizing _swhip_.

The officer grimaces. The damn thief has the department bugged.

They are in the boiler room in the basement of Alcari Laboratories, hidden behind rows of steaming steel and machinery. The thief in question had disguised himself as a police officer and infiltrated the ranks sent in to the campus to search him out. One thing led to another that led to Detective Kogane sitting on his aggravated ass, watching the _Blue Paladin_ have his way with him – again.

Kogane prays that his colleagues won't find them. "You are a criminal and I will do everything in my power to make sure that your crimes are righted."

"So doesn't our arrangement work out nicely?" the thief smirks as his hands dip seductively into the space between the inspector's hips and the fabric of his pants. "You fuck me. And I give you the item I stole." He holds up one hand to show his latest conquest – a key-ring with a cerulean USB holding the Alcari's latest technological research, research that their competitors would pay _billions_ for.

Kogane feels the touch of Blue's hands and his spine seems to twist into his core. He is already anticipating what is to come.

He hates that he just sits there. He hates that he relents. He hates that he finds this boy absolutely fucking beautiful with his white-silver hair (probably a wig), his flawlessly tanned skin (probably sprayed on), and his bright mischievous cobalt eyes – the color of the prettiest sea (probably not fake). Dammit.

"Because, to me, _Inspector_ ," Blue warbles smoothly, _sensually_ , he leans in so that his lips are only inches away from Kogane's ear. "Stealing your heart would be my greatest accomplishment."

Kogane tries to glower but Blue slides his hand to the fabric of Kogane's boxers taut against his groin.

The thief whispers the heated touch of his lips against the detective's neck while kneading the quavering member beneath his hands. The sensations elicit something from Kogane's breath – warmth, stimulation, passion…he is not sure.

He _is_ sure, however, that he does not want to find out. "That's never going to happen because I fucking hate you," he manages to growl through his attempts to repress the shudders.

Blue draws back just slightly so that the investigator could see the teasing smile on his lips. "Or do you hate that you love fucking me?"

The policeman grits his teeth and Blue remedies that with a forceful kiss.

The soft touch of his lips, their shared breaths, Blue's body grinding against the heat of his own, then the dizzying sensation of the thief's tongue against each wanting crevice of his mouth almost convinces Kogane to moan into the pleasure.

But his better judgment snaps him out of it and he bites.

Blue sucks his teeth as he pulls back and strokes the bleeding cut on his lip with his thumb. Then he releases a wafting laugh. "You know, Inspector Kogane, the great paradox of your personality is that you are so damn pensive but so obtusely impulsive."

"And you never shut up," Kogane retorts, trying to ignore the very cogent assessments the thief always seems to make of him.

Blue chuckles and Kogane sneers. Then his boxers are shimmied down his legs.

The thief leans down and gently holds Kogane's hardening member in his cool, smooth hands. He brings the tip to his lips.

Kogane stops breathing.

Blue parts his lips and begins to lovingly caress Kogane's penis with his mouth and tongue.

Kogane tilts his head up to the air – he gasps and his lungs stagger.

"For an Asian dude, your dick is quite the specimen," Blue mutters against the flesh he worships with tender licking and sucking.

"You racist motherfu-,"

Blue abruptly sucks against the flesh of his balls and Keith shudders – the whole of his body and mind dies a little death – but not quite there yet.

"No, you're not allowed to cum unless you're inside me," Blue sings as he lets his pants slip down below his butt. One hand grapples onto Kogane's collarbone to anchor the thief as he _prepares_ himself with his other hand.

Kogane feels the haze of sex cloud his mind and his panting – and the fog seems to spread to Blue who whimpers and falls onto Kogane's shoulders. The police officer slowly says. "Doesn't it hurt? Just sticking it in like that?"

" _Mmmm_ ," Blue moans and slowly lifts himself to his knees. "Oh, it hurts like shit if you don't use lube," he laughs then pulls his hand from behind to show a wet condom over two of his fingers. "That's why I always bring _extra_ lubricated condoms."

Keith feels his eye twitch. "You're so fucking crazy."

"No, I'm just so fucking in love." He kisses the officer curtly on the lips. "And _very_ prepared."

Kogane furrows his brows and he watches, while in deep contemplation, the thief transfer the condom from off his fingers onto _his_ still throbbing hard penis.

The Blue Paladin positions himself above and finally, finally, _finally_ , thrusts his body onto the other man's member with a satisfying sound echoing in tandem with their panting and their moans.

Now it is his turn to shudder. " _Fuck_ , yes," Blue whispers desperately into the warm air and he begins moving.

Soft, wet, slapping noises sound out into the air and the beats between quicken with every time the Blue Paladin mewls into Kogane's ear.

" _Nnn_ , yes, deeper, _fuck."_

Keith, without realizing it, rocks his hips against Blue whenever he descends, ramming him back up in the air. Then down again – the rhythm of their sex envelops them.

" _Ahh,_ "

" _Shut up_ ,"

"I _can't_ – you, _mmm_ ,"

"Fuck."

Everything starts slowly then builds and accelerates. Soon, neither of them can keep up with their acquired desperate tempo towards satisfaction.

Blue pants, urgently, "Fuck me. _Yes_." Another thrust. "Ah, God, I love your dick."

Keith scowls and grunts, "So do you love me or my dick?"

Something between a laugh and a gasp flutters out from Blue's breath and Keith thrusts again so that Blue barely whispers out, " _Both_ ,"

"Why?" Keith grunts again as he feels the man's warmth descend upon him again. "What have I done –kgg," Another desperate, emotive thrust. Blue jolts. "To make you so fucking obsessed?"

Blue does not respond just yet – his breath, his moans, his heat all rise in speed and volume – and Keith realizes – his does too.

Blue suddenly flings his arms around Keith's shoulders. Then reveals, in short spurts of faint and feeble whispers, "I'm just a talkative Cuban boy that no one gave a fuck about."

Keith bucks and they both gasp.

Blue continues, "And the first person who ever really paid any attention to me was you."

Before the detective could register or even react, Blue moans, " _Keith_ ," into his open mouth and closes it with his own. Their tongues writhe against each other and a surge bursts from within Kogane and he bucks into Blue one last final time and he growls as he finally climaxes.

A whimper from Blue's throat floats into Keith's and their tongues still grapple against each other.

Keith – in his haze – does not realize until it is too late that another sensation – other than Blue's lips and tongue – is felt in his mouth.

Blue forces the small oval object down to Keith's throat by force and Kogane manages to think, "What the-?" before the potent sleeping pill kicks in.

The thief scoffs in disbelief. "Damn, this dude really doesn't think before he acts, huh?" Then he repositions himself and brings a hand to his dick to help himself reach the climax Keith Kogane was just shy of helping him attain. "At least you're gorgeous," he murmurs warmly as he uses his free hand to draw back Keith's bangs so that his handsome, sleeping features are in full view. "Except for the mullet."

He then takes a few moments to reach climax then splutters his seed onto the officer's clothes and chuckles to himself. He takes the USB from off his finger and places it into the man's coat pocket then rises to stand and clean himself up.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Detective,"

* * *

The next day, around dusk, Keith Kogane – his mind and soul burdened by all of these fucking problems – smokes a cigarette on the balcony of his apartment while staring blankly over the lackluster view his cheap apartment provided.

His superior yelled at him again.

His heart beat again when Shiro smiled at him.

And, oh goodness, he fucked the Blue Paladin again.

He sighs and takes a long drag.

"Rough day?"

Keith looks to the side to see his neighbor waving at him from their adjacent terrace.

 _And thus arrives the least controversial but still somewhat complicated problem of Keith Kogane – his little (slightly flirty) friendship with his neighbor, Lance McClain._

"Hey, Lance…yeah, I guess you could say it's been a rough day… _and_ night."

Lance reaches down then holds up two cold, dewy and already opened bottles of beer. "How about a little pick-me-up?"

Keith puts out his cigarette in a nearby ashtray and graciously reaches over the shared railing to take a bottle.

"Thanks."

Lance smiles back and they both indulge in a swig while the spring winds flutter between them.

"You were in the papers again," Lance comments a little while later. "Detective Kogane foils the Blue Paladin from ruining Alcari Labs," he announces with an advertising tone and slides his hand up in the air to mimic a marquee.

Keith groans and puts the bottle to his lips. "Huh,"

"You would think he'd get discouraged from all the times you've stopped him."

"I haven't," Keith mutters then takes another sip of the hoppy liquid.

"What?"

"I haven't stopped him," the policeman explains. "I haven't captured him yet. I just recover whatever he steals." Then he shrugs. "Maybe I'm just not good enough."

Lance frowns then, at length, asks, "…were you being sarcastic?"

"Attempting," Keith turns his gaze to him. "Did it work?"

Lance's eyes disappear for a moment behind the glare off of his glasses. "Not really," then he laughs.

Keith relinquishes a small smile to the mood growing between them sharing beers and looking out over the city.

"I think you're good enough," Lance states, apropos of the mood as well.

Keith allows surprise to take over his expression. "You think?"

Lance tilts his head to his neighbor's direction and beams. "More than you know."


End file.
